Along with your profile text, your picture is, really, all you are on line. Your words are your voice and your picture gives you a face. Zoosk has policies about prohibited photos (https://www.zoosk.com/photo_guidelines.php) and we require that you have at least one photo on your profile before you interact with other members; a clear picture of just you, showing your full (or mostly) face. If you think about it, that makes sense: without a face your messages are just a voice with no body! You’re like a ghost: Spooooooky! So if you want to be not-so-creepy, you’ll want the best pictures you can get. Now, in all honesty, I am not a photographer, but from several years working online I can offer you some good advice about what is a bad photograph!
The most common problem is the blurry shot. Back in the day this was caused by poorly focused lenses and incorrect shutter speed, but no one uses such jargon when talking about digital photographs: what matters is called “resolution” or “pixels-per-inch” and when a picture gets blurry it’s called “pixelation”. Forget the lingo: what it means is that some pictures look quite nice very small but when enlarged they look horrid! Here is a sample:
Notice that the smaller version looks ok. When expanded to display size (as on your Zoosk datecard) the picture looses all clarity. This is a bad choice for any photo and our moderating team will probably delete it. The solution is to start with a larger photo:
If you have a larger photo to start with it won’t expand and so it will show in exactly the way you expect it to. A blurry pic doesn’t say anything bad. Other pictures manage to convey a message you mightn’t like however.
Don’t hide your face! This sends a message, loud and clear, to the other Zooskers looking at your profile: “I have something to hide. There’s a reason I’m too embarrassed to show off my face!” Got a girlfriend already? If you don’t want to look like some sort of creepy lurker, show your face!
One other problem affects other-wise perfectly good photos: the group shot.
Whose profile is this? Yes, you might be able to piece it together from other parts of the profile or by pairing it up with other pictures, but what if this is your only photo? We do ask that your primary photo, at least, be of you only: a clear shot of your face. Imagine going on your first date in a candle-lit restaurant, would your fellow Zoosker know you from your photo?
Of course you could edit this picture so it was only one face or the other, but then you’d have a too-small picture that would show up blurry on the site just like our first example. This is fated to be a second photo, but not a primary one.
A companion problem is pictures that are too dark. These are usually taken with your computer camera – often with a light coming from behind. This throws off what is called the “exposure” in the picture:
Natural lighting works best, but sometimes your computer may not want to travel outside! Cell phones are good if they take good photos and you can easily get the photo from your phone to the web. If you have an Android phone or an iPhone/iPad, our Zoosk Apps (available for all three) will let you take a photo and upload it directly to your Zoosk Datecard!
There are some photo problems that seem to affect some users more than others.
Guys seem to take this picture a lot, and we’ve noticed that woman just don’t like it. At all. Not one little bit. In fact, we get complaints about pictures like this and so it violates our moderation rules. We delete pictures like this whenever we see them. Why do guys take this picture over and over? This may be one of the great mysteries of the universe. This says several things to other users:
You have no friends.
You do have a very big ego.
Probably not much else, however.
You wouldn’t know how to get a woman’s attention if you tried.
Trust me: you have friends! One of them will help you take pictures! Just ask – and if you do, indeed, have the sort of body that you can show off, a picture of you relaxing by the pool on vacation is way better than inside your bathroom!
What works best for a primary photo is a nice, smiling picture; the classic head-shot. But what happens if you add a picture to your profile and instead of looking right it looks like the one below?
We’ve got you covered there! Next to each picture uploaded on your photo page, you’ll find a blue button that says “Edit”. Clicking there will help you make simple changes: you can rotate the picture and cut it to size.
There we go!
We do allow secondary photos on your profile, you can have a total of six different shots. It’s best to show your readers things you enjoy such as you skiing or you in the Community Choir, or you relaxing on the beach with a tropical beverage (preferably with lots of fruit and an umbrella).
All pictures are seen by our moderation team and in the review process they may get deleted. If a picture suddenly vanishes from your profile, it’s possible it was moderated and deleted. There are some things that we just don’t allow and you can find out about that on our photo policy page, https://www.zoosk.com/photo_guidelines.php. Those aside I hope this post helps you avoid not just “illegal” pics but also “bad” ones. Feel free to contact customer support by email (mailto:support@zoosk.com) or by phone (888-939-6675) if you have any questions.
I met this incredible woman your dating site. She currently lives in Phoenix and I have to say she has really changed my life in such a short period of time. They say 3rd time is a charm, more like a beautiful diamond thanks Zoosk. I see a long relationship with this extraordinary woman. –Maria & Zac from Phoenix, Arizona
Congrats to Maria & Zac! We’re wishing them all the best! Do you have a Zoosk success story of your own? Send your Zoosk success story to success [at] zoosk [dot] com! We’d love to feature it!
Zoosk now has over 6 million Facebook fans! We’re so grateful to our fans for all their love and support. We thank our fans for their love and support in making Zoosk’s one of the most popular pages on all Facebook!
Zoosk couple of-the-dayKelly & Matt from Oklahoma found each other on Zoosk, fell in love, and now they’re engaged to be married! Kelly writes:
“Matt and I found each other on Zoosk and began talking for a couple weeks. I think, when we met, it was love at first sight. I introduced him to my then 9 month old son and it was a perfect connection between the two of them as well. We are a family, and my son is now 18 months old and sees Matt as his father. We are engaged and plan for a winter wedding on January 7th, 2012. Thank you Zoosk!” –Kelly & Matt, Oklahoma
Congrats to Kelly & Matt!
PS: Have you met someone special on Zoosk too? Send your Zoosk success story to success [at] zoosk [dot] com! We’d love to share your happy news!
In Bertrand Russell’s celebrated essay, “In Praise of Idleness,” the distinguished analytic philosopher and Nobel Laureate contends, quite rationally, “I think that there is far too much work done in the world, that immense harm is caused by the belief that work is virtuous. I hope that, after reading the following pages, the leaders of the YMCA will start a campaign to induce good young men to do nothing.” And, just for dramatic effect, he adds, “If so, I shall not have lived in vain.”
In response this glorious display of intellect, Zoosk responds most enthusiastically, “Hear hear!”
It appears that the folks at TechCrunch might also believe, as Russell himself did, that “Leisure is essential to civilization.” Could there be a truer truism? Purveyors of romantic leisure that we are, Zoosk is rightfully honored to have made it to the final round of voting at this year’s 2009 TechCrunch Crunchies Awards in a category we are proud to be recognized in: Best Time Sink Application.
But we also adhere to the belief that the pursuit of love is an activity that, albeit leisurely, is absolutely necessary. Plus, leisure is useful too. Sure, you can’t expense a date on the company card or charge it to your place of work as a billable hour, but the time you spend looking for love is fully compensated, at the end of the road, when you find it. So while some time may sink during the quest, that time will be worth it when you get to your final destination. Think of it as a potentially long flight that just happens to take off and land at the exact same local time, just in different time zones.
So remember, everyone, vote for Zoosk! “Each person is invited to vote once per category per day through Wednesday, January 6th at midnight PST. Once you cast a vote in a category, you are able to share your vote through Twitter and Facebook.” Put a little bit of work in for Zoosk by voting every day until January 6th, and we’ll ensure you get the best time sink application the web has to offer for as long as your heart desires. XO.
Of course, Zoosk’s mission is to introduce you to singles in your local area and hook you up with potential dates, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make friends or join our Community discussions while you’re at it. During moments of downtime during your maelstrom of flirting, check out our Community boards for relevant dating tips, fun conversation, and online dating success stories from our users.
The Community is also a fun way to get to know people from all over the world. If you’re not opposed to a long distance relationship, you can even meet people on the Community boards. We’ve had it happen before! All you have to do to go to a person’s profile from the Community pages is click on their photo. The right hand side of a Community post also shows if a Zoosker is currently online, how many posts they’ve made, and how long they’ve been on Zoosk. To message a person from the Community boards, all you need to do is click the little envelope icon below their photo. See below.
Whenever you make a community post, it goes on your status feed as well, as Zoosk’s status feed that gets shown to Zooskers within your search criteria. Yet another way to get noticed — not a bad deal! We also host contests on our Community for coins and other prizes. Who doesn’t love prizes? I hope you’re convinced now that Community participation is fun! Of course, it’s totally up to you, but we’d like to to know that it’s an option, and a good one at that.
Mashable’s 3rd Annual OpenWeb Awards are open for user submitted nominations and votes. Last year, Zoosk won an OpenWeb Award for Best Dating and Romance site. This year, Dating and Romance is no longer a category, so Zoosk is up for overall Best Facebook Application! We’re excited for the opportunity to win this category, so help us out with your nominations and we will love you forever (and ever and ever).
How do you nominate Zoosk for Best Facebook Application? Simply go to the Best Facebook Application nomination landing page. Make sure you are logged into Mashable via your Facebook username and password (to vote, you must log in via Facebook Connect). Once you’re on the nominations landing page, type “Zoosk” into the field for “Best Facebook App”. Then hit “Submit”. You’re done. Beautiful.
Nominate us, and then tell your friends to nominate us. We love you dearly. Please love us back?
If you let it out of its cage, jealousy is the green-eyed monster that can and does cause irreparable damage to your relationship. A little bit of jealousy can be cute and even healthy. You should care if you see your partner flirting with someone else at a bar, but you shouldn’t get into a bar fight. But when it rages out of control, jealousy can damage your relationship with your partner, your friends, your family, and worst of all, yourself.
Fundamentally, jealousy is an insecurity: an inability to trust another person to be truthful to you. At its heart, jealousy stems from a lack of trust. Because jealous people don’t trust that their partners will act honestly, they attempt to coerce their partners with controlling, manipulative, and angry emotions. Nobody enjoys being manipulated or controlled, so often times, jealous behavior has the opposite effect than the one it intended: you end up pushing people away.
Why do we search for love? I might as well ask you why the sun shines or why water is wet. We don’t always know why we search for love; we just do it. Perhaps the only answer to such a complex question is simply “because.” Most of us hope that one day we will find someone we love who will love us back, with whom we can grow with in an affectionate, positive relationship of the sort that fairy tales describe as “happily ever after”. We don’t really question why. We feel an almost subconscious drive, and in our search most of us encounter a lot of false alarms, dead ends, and failures before finding the person who makes all our struggles worth the effort.
I recently posed to our Zoosk community a question, “Why do you search for love? What are your personal reasons for continuing along the path towards relationship fulfillment?” The answers I received were a surprising and poignant study on the depths of the human heart. It seems that our community is a romantic bunch, and they’re looking for love because, in the words of one Zoosker, “I am looking for hope.” Here’s what some of our other Zooskers had to say. Get out your Kleenex.
The Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines the word earnest as: “a serious and intent mental state”. What does earnestness mean in connection to our personal relationships? We can view earnestness as our sincerity in relationships, our honest decision to really be ourselves. In a nutshell, our earnestness reflects our ability to open ourselves up in relationships and put ourselves out there — even if it means revealing our vulnerabilities. It is our conscious decision never to lie about ourselves or present ourselves falsely to those we love.
Part of the process of being in love means that we must let go out our fears and struggles. Love means baring your soul to another person. How do we do this? Naturally, it’s not always easy. The process takes time, trust, and commitment.
Perhaps we don’t open ourselves up right away. In fact, in the beginning, before we really grow to know another person and before we can trust our judgments when it comes to that person, perhaps it’s not so wise to bare our souls without hesitation. But once we decide that we are going to commit, that the leap into a serious relationship is one that we want to take, then we must also take the leap of faith and relinquish any fear we might have of being completely vulnerable.
Zoosk has received heart-warming letters from couples from all over the world have found love on Zoosk. We are proud to share these real life success stories with you.