Posts Tagged date
Some simple rules you should know about text messaging and online dating
by Juliet O
While text messaging is generally seen as pretty unromantic, it can actually be a very useful dating tool. A self-identified text message addict, I believe that, when done right, text messages are actually useful in the beginning states of building a relationship. Think about it: texting allows you to have a constant stream of communication with an individual that you are seeing — not as an alternative, but rather an addition, to calling — an added-value to traditional phone conversation. Specifically, I love getting text messages from people just to say “good morning” or “good night”. A basic “How are you” or a “How is your day” text message is a nice, welcome interruption in the middle of a day. Sometimes, the simplest text messages can seem the most romantic. Something as seemingly mundane as an “I’m thinking about you” text message can be an incredibly sweet gesture, and when used correctly, a well-crafted text message can put butterflies in your sweetie’s stomach and stars in their eyes.
So what are some basic rules to follow by, when exchanging text messages with someone you meet on Zoosk? Here’s some textiquette guidelines, tailored from an online dating perspective.
2 comments October 1, 2009
Fall is in the air — 6 ideas for a great autumn date!
By Juliet O
Who doesn’t love the unique smells and sights of autumn? Fall is in the air, and everywhere I look, I can see signs of the season changing. The leaves are starting to change color, the mornings and evenings feel crisp and cool, and we’re dusting off the sweaters and scarves we’ve set aside in the heat of summer. Even in a place where there are no ‘real’ seasons (San Francisco), I can sense subtle changes that let me know it’s time to eat lots of apples, pumpkins, sweet potatoes, and butternut squash.
Fall also ushers in new, interesting opportunities for fun dating. No other season offers you the chance to take your sweetie apple-picking, tailgating, or on a rustic nature drive to see the brightly colored leaves. Celebrate the new season with these 6 great date ideas — and make the chilly days just a little bit warmer.
1 comment September 29, 2009
Our Zooskers, on the meaning of love.
By Juliet O
You Zooskers are a romantic bunch. We recently posed the question on our community pages, “What is your definition of love?” The responses we received were varied and astute — and simultaneously romantic and accurate.
Love, by its very nature, is almost impossible to define. Even geniuses like Albert Einstein admit their bafflement when it comes to explaining this emotional phenomenon. Love appears to resist our ability to rationalize it, as well as our attempts to tie it down to any unified definition. “How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?” asked Einstein. We don’t know either, Einstein. However, in finding love within our own lives and in choosing to participate in the act of loving, we attempt to explain love by our behaviors that characterize this emotion — one that exists within the mysterious shrouds of subjectivity. We all express and experience love differently, and it was interesting hearing your individual perceptions, lovely Zooskers, of this singular, exquisite emotion.
5 comments September 28, 2009
How to be a better online flirt
By Juliet O
Being a flirt, online or IRL (in real life) takes a certain level of finesse. Some people are naturally charismatic, effortless flirts. Other people become successful flirts by learning the tricks of the trade through trial and error. Others flirt minimally or not at all. We use the term “flirt” very loosely. When we say flirt, we do not mean cheesy compliments and canned pick-up lines. Saying something like “there is a mirror in your pants because I can see myself in them” is not flirting with another individual. That’s just flirting with disaster.
By flirting, we mean the art of witty and spontaneous banter. By flirting, we mean using dialogue and conversation to attract people to you, engaging with people in a light-hearted, fun, easy, and graceful way to bond with people romantically. With the medium of online dating, success necessarily involves utilizing the written word (i.e. your online flirting ability) as a social skill.
Composing a dashing and coquettish email is not as difficult as it seems. Just as there are tips and tricks with flirting in real life, there are rules (and shortcuts) with flirting online. So how do you turn your drab little “Hi, my name is…” email into a sparkling, enchanting, tantalizing series of bon mots sure to send any reader into throes of ecstatic bliss? Harness all your writing ability, and get ready to become a veritable Lord Byron, because it’s not as hard as it seems. Here are some tips on how you can use your pen as Cupid uses his arrow, piercing the hearts of everyone around you with the undeniable magnetism and sublimity of your belles-lettres.
5 comments September 27, 2009
10 qualities to look for in a successful match
By Juliet O
What are some keys to a healthy relationship? All great relationships have certain things in common. Here is a list of the qualities to look for in building a great, lasting relationship with someone. I challenge you to find a single example of a good, functioning relationship that does not exhibit all of these characteristics. The following are universal characteristics of all wonderful relationships, and you deserve to find a person who exhibits them all:
10. Empathy
An individual’s ability to empathize with you is crucial in a relationship. Empathy is an important relationship skill that both parties should develop. Empathy is the ability to view the world from your partner’s eyes. Being able to put yourself in your partner’s shoes is essential to building a long term relationship based on mutual understanding. Empathy means being a team, a “we” rather than an isolated “I”.
9 comments September 24, 2009
10 things to avoid when choosing a date
By Juliet O
We all make mistakes, especially when it comes to love. Love can blind us to a person’s faults. In love’s darker moments, when confronted with warning signs that tell us blatantly that we shouldn’t be with this person we foolishly love, and that they are hurting us, we stubbornly choose to ignore them despite our better judgment.
Luckily, when we are faced with our own catastrophic mistakes, we can learn from them and avoid making the same mistakes in the future. Falling for the wrong person is one of the biggest — and most painful — mistakes you can make in the game of love. You shouldn’t feel too bad if you’ve ever loved someone who ripped your heart out of your chest to use like a soccer ball. We’ve all been there, seriously. But from a person who’s been in that situation, I hope it never happens again and that we all learn from our mistakes. So, seasoned daters — here are 10 types of daters you should avoid at all cost to prevent future heartache. Pay attention to these red flags!
3 comments September 23, 2009
10 ways you can enjoy being single
By Juliet O
We love being single here at Zoosk. And we hope you singles out there are enjoying and celebrating your singlehood. We’re an online dating website, so obviously, we don’t want you to remain single forever. However, we believe that in order to be successful in a relationship, you have to first be okay with being single. It’s like that old saying: to love another person you have to first love yourself. To celebrate singles everywhere, we’ve come up with 10 simple, easy ways you can make the most out of being single (and ready to mingle).
10. Go out to a great dinner with your single friends
One of the best aspects of being single is hanging out with your single friends. Spending time with couples is okay, but from a singleton myself, I definitely prefer hanging out with fellow singles. We’re just more fun! And we definitely know how to party. This week, organize a dinner with your single pals. Whether its casual or elegant, raucous or sedate, go somewhere for food and drinks with the company of people you enjoy spending time with.
3 comments September 22, 2009
Remember to celebrate being single this week!
By Juliet O
Hello singles. Are you celebrating? Because in case it’s escaped your radar, this week is National Singles Week!
20 years ago, a group of people known as the Buckeye Singles Council created NSW to celebrate the lives and accomplishments of single and unmarried people, and to recognize their important contributions to society (like keeping bars and nightclubs open!). Since its inception, NSW has become widely observed around the world.
Coinciding with National Singles Week, we conducted a survey of over a thousand of our Zooskers, asking you for your thoughts on single and unmarried life. The results are fascinating. Contrary to what you might think, we found that the men we surveyed voted that they’d rather settle down in a relationship, while the women we surveyed stated that they enjoyed being single. 49% of men wish they weren’t single, as opposed to 31.5% of women.
We also found that Zooskers, overall, have quite a romantic viewpoint on love.
(more…)
Add comment September 21, 2009
Don’t try too hard to impress
By Juliet O
There’s no moment sadder than the moment someone blatantly tries to impress you and fails epically. “Depending on which economic calculation you use, I may or may not be the richest person in the world. I’m good friends with this guy who knows Bruce Springsteen. Surveys have shown that I’m the most attractive person in Michigan. Can I buy you a drink?” No. No, you may not.
Number one, you’re lying, and number two, what, am I supposed to be impressed? Ew. Can’t we just stop trying to impress one another and start being ourselves?
2 comments September 19, 2009
Warning! Your date may be at risk from pet peeves
By Juliet O
To find out more about what pisses you Zooskers off, we posted over at the new and improved community forums asking for your biggest dating pet peeves. The response we got was varied, insightful, and revealing. Here are the top 10 most frequently cited pet peeves, and advice on how to avoid them.
1. Texting
It seems, hands down, the pet peeve we noticed most frequently was regarding cell phone use during a date. People really, really don’t like it when you use a cell phone on a date. Says Zoosker Shannon, “I understand when an emergency comes up, but it’s so important to be present with each other especially when you’re learning about each other.” Zoosker Tommy agrees. “I can’t stand texting while on a date. It’s rude and a really bad impression for me when they text while I’m in the middle of saying something or if it’s while they are saying something and they abruptly stop, text, and then continue.” Texting can be an addictive thing, but if you want to make a good impression on a first date, keep your phone away from you greedy little fingers! Turn the phone to silent or vibrate, and put it deep in your pocket or handbag. Equally bad as texting is constantly checking your phone to see if you’ve received any messages. You can check your phone if you excuse yourself to use the restroom, but never in front of your date unless it’s an absolute emergency. As Zoosker DD states, “Put the phone down and try to enjoy yourself.”
9 comments September 18, 2009
