Posts Tagged Dating Stories
How to be a better online flirt
By Juliet O
Being a flirt, online or IRL (in real life) takes a certain level of finesse. Some people are naturally charismatic, effortless flirts. Other people become successful flirts by learning the tricks of the trade through trial and error. Others flirt minimally or not at all. We use the term “flirt” very loosely. When we say flirt, we do not mean cheesy compliments and canned pick-up lines. Saying something like “there is a mirror in your pants because I can see myself in them” is not flirting with another individual. That’s just flirting with disaster.
By flirting, we mean the art of witty and spontaneous banter. By flirting, we mean using dialogue and conversation to attract people to you, engaging with people in a light-hearted, fun, easy, and graceful way to bond with people romantically. With the medium of online dating, success necessarily involves utilizing the written word (i.e. your online flirting ability) as a social skill.
Composing a dashing and coquettish email is not as difficult as it seems. Just as there are tips and tricks with flirting in real life, there are rules (and shortcuts) with flirting online. So how do you turn your drab little “Hi, my name is…” email into a sparkling, enchanting, tantalizing series of bon mots sure to send any reader into throes of ecstatic bliss? Harness all your writing ability, and get ready to become a veritable Lord Byron, because it’s not as hard as it seems. Here are some tips on how you can use your pen as Cupid uses his arrow, piercing the hearts of everyone around you with the undeniable magnetism and sublimity of your belles-lettres.
5 comments September 27, 2009
10 things to avoid when choosing a date
By Juliet O
We all make mistakes, especially when it comes to love. Love can blind us to a person’s faults. In love’s darker moments, when confronted with warning signs that tell us blatantly that we shouldn’t be with this person we foolishly love, and that they are hurting us, we stubbornly choose to ignore them despite our better judgment.
Luckily, when we are faced with our own catastrophic mistakes, we can learn from them and avoid making the same mistakes in the future. Falling for the wrong person is one of the biggest — and most painful — mistakes you can make in the game of love. You shouldn’t feel too bad if you’ve ever loved someone who ripped your heart out of your chest to use like a soccer ball. We’ve all been there, seriously. But from a person who’s been in that situation, I hope it never happens again and that we all learn from our mistakes. So, seasoned daters — here are 10 types of daters you should avoid at all cost to prevent future heartache. Pay attention to these red flags!
3 comments September 23, 2009
10 ways you can enjoy being single
By Juliet O
We love being single here at Zoosk. And we hope you singles out there are enjoying and celebrating your singlehood. We’re an online dating website, so obviously, we don’t want you to remain single forever. However, we believe that in order to be successful in a relationship, you have to first be okay with being single. It’s like that old saying: to love another person you have to first love yourself. To celebrate singles everywhere, we’ve come up with 10 simple, easy ways you can make the most out of being single (and ready to mingle).
10. Go out to a great dinner with your single friends
One of the best aspects of being single is hanging out with your single friends. Spending time with couples is okay, but from a singleton myself, I definitely prefer hanging out with fellow singles. We’re just more fun! And we definitely know how to party. This week, organize a dinner with your single pals. Whether its casual or elegant, raucous or sedate, go somewhere for food and drinks with the company of people you enjoy spending time with.
3 comments September 22, 2009
Remember to celebrate being single this week!
By Juliet O
Hello singles. Are you celebrating? Because in case it’s escaped your radar, this week is National Singles Week!
20 years ago, a group of people known as the Buckeye Singles Council created NSW to celebrate the lives and accomplishments of single and unmarried people, and to recognize their important contributions to society (like keeping bars and nightclubs open!). Since its inception, NSW has become widely observed around the world.
Coinciding with National Singles Week, we conducted a survey of over a thousand of our Zooskers, asking you for your thoughts on single and unmarried life. The results are fascinating. Contrary to what you might think, we found that the men we surveyed voted that they’d rather settle down in a relationship, while the women we surveyed stated that they enjoyed being single. 49% of men wish they weren’t single, as opposed to 31.5% of women.
We also found that Zooskers, overall, have quite a romantic viewpoint on love.
(more…)
Add comment September 21, 2009
Don’t try too hard to impress
By Juliet O
There’s no moment sadder than the moment someone blatantly tries to impress you and fails epically. “Depending on which economic calculation you use, I may or may not be the richest person in the world. I’m good friends with this guy who knows Bruce Springsteen. Surveys have shown that I’m the most attractive person in Michigan. Can I buy you a drink?” No. No, you may not.
Number one, you’re lying, and number two, what, am I supposed to be impressed? Ew. Can’t we just stop trying to impress one another and start being ourselves?
2 comments September 19, 2009
Warning! Your date may be at risk from pet peeves
By Juliet O
To find out more about what pisses you Zooskers off, we posted over at the new and improved community forums asking for your biggest dating pet peeves. The response we got was varied, insightful, and revealing. Here are the top 10 most frequently cited pet peeves, and advice on how to avoid them.
1. Texting
It seems, hands down, the pet peeve we noticed most frequently was regarding cell phone use during a date. People really, really don’t like it when you use a cell phone on a date. Says Zoosker Shannon, “I understand when an emergency comes up, but it’s so important to be present with each other especially when you’re learning about each other.” Zoosker Tommy agrees. “I can’t stand texting while on a date. It’s rude and a really bad impression for me when they text while I’m in the middle of saying something or if it’s while they are saying something and they abruptly stop, text, and then continue.” Texting can be an addictive thing, but if you want to make a good impression on a first date, keep your phone away from you greedy little fingers! Turn the phone to silent or vibrate, and put it deep in your pocket or handbag. Equally bad as texting is constantly checking your phone to see if you’ve received any messages. You can check your phone if you excuse yourself to use the restroom, but never in front of your date unless it’s an absolute emergency. As Zoosker DD states, “Put the phone down and try to enjoy yourself.”
9 comments September 18, 2009
Dating advice: how to use Zoosk to get over a broken heart
By Juliet O
There is arguably no worse feeling, in the entire universe, than a broken heart. At least — that’s what you trick yourself into believing when you are suffering at the end of an intense relationship. Whirlwind romances — with their highs, lows, and everything in between — leave you exhausted at the end of the journey. Exhausted, and bewildered. And a host of other adjectives: devastated, dysfunctional, jaded, temporarily insane.
It’s okay. We’ve all been there. In fact, I challenge anyone to find me an adult person (who isn’t a sociopath) who hasn’t at one point experienced the pains of being brokenhearted. It happens to each and every one of us, and when it happens, we are never really prepared for what is to follow. A lot goes on in the human heart. It’s a mysterious organ.
The next question then, when realizing that lovesickness happens to us all, is how something that feels so catastrophic be at the same time so terribly mundane. Because it is mundane, and it’s also horribly monotonous. You feel the exact same way (sad, bereft, lost, alone) for a really, really long time with hardly any positive emotional interruptions to lighten that dull blanket of gloom. How unfair, to feel exactly the same, for so long — and to feel as if you hardly have any control of it at all.
But the thing is, you do have control. At least, you have some control. And with effort, you can at least pull yourself out of your depressing doldrums into a more stable place, if you try. It isn’t easy to force yourself to ’snap out of it,’ but in the end, you’ll realize it’s for the best and thank us. If you are suffering from a broken heart and are trying to mend it with Zoosk, here are some tips that might help you.
6 comments September 16, 2009
Online dating rule: take things slow
By Juliet O
“Take it slow” is probably the single best piece of relationship advice that people never seem to want to hear. Like relationships in real life, online relationships can also move way too fast. And I don’t have to remind you about the story of the turtle and the hare. There are many reasons to take things slowly on Zoosk, but the biggest reason is also the most obvious one: you don’t know this other Zoosker yet. And you should get to know them, before you meet in real life.
Reducing the speed at which you barrel toward love, marriage, and mortgage, actually makes dating more fun. Many people claim that the very best time to be in love is at the beginning of relationships, when all the euphoric, mesmerizing feelings of love are at their most intense. Why not prolong that intensity as long as possible? When poets write about love, they are almost never talking about comfortable long term relationships. They write about the dizzying feeling of falling in love with someone and the first stages of blossoming affection. Let the excitement of falling in love last as long as possible! There is simply no need to hurry. What’s the rush? If it’s meant to be, it will be.
5 comments September 11, 2009
August was a good month for love
Hurray! It’s that time of the month again, when we reveal the winning couple of the previous months’ Success Story contest. We’ve heard many beautiful love stories that left our hearts fluttering, but the August story that particularly tugged on our heartstrings was sent to us from a Zoosker from Detroit named Jason. He initially sent in this message on August 20, after he encountered a woman named Ang on Zoosk. In fact, he sent us this success story before he actually met Ang in real life, while they were still just chatting on the phone!
2 comments September 9, 2009
Love Advice: How to overcome shyness
By Juliet O
Zooskers often write in our Community Forums asking for advice on love. The Zoosk Community is incredibly supportive of each other, and when a Zoosker seeks love advice on the forums, other Zooskers weigh in and offer their assistance. It’s a nice feeling, knowing that there is a community of people willing to help you work through your love and relationship problems.
As more and more questions arise on our forums, we’ve discovered certain similarities among the questions we’ve seen. Questions often fall into distinct camps. And questions tend to be finite. We get a lot of the same questions over and over again. That should be reassuring news! This means that — for each person out there who has love or relationship problems — there are other people in the world with the same problems. You are not alone! And we want to help too. You don’t have to take our advice, or even listen to what we have to say, but we want you — yes, you! — out there to know that we really do care.
We want to participate in the conversation. So, each week we’ll be taking a question from the Zoosk Community Forums and giving our take on the situation. Unofficial advice from official Zoosk. Here’s this week’s question, posed by Zoosker Jay. This is taken from our Broken Heart, Now What forum.
2 comments September 4, 2009
