Frugal Dating Tips For Tough Economic Times

By Aleks Oniszczak

Love doesn’t have to take a back seat in tough economic times. To the contrary, a little bit of creativity will put you back in the driver’s seat and you’ll have fun doing something different from the usual dinner and a movie!

Let’s start with dinner – what is it exactly that makes going out for dinner fun? There’s the novelty of going to a new restaurant or the familiarity and comfort of going to a favorite spot. There’s the anticipation of going out, getting ready, getting out of the house, experiencing the buzz and energy of people and conversations around you and, of course, walking back to the car and going home feeling like you’ve done something more with your time than sitting on the couch watching TV.

But most importantly, there’s the conversation with your special someone – getting to know them, sharing an experience and having fun. But this experience comes at a price! Sure it’s fun to eat sushi or check out that fancy new burger place, but it’ll cost you. If you’re on a budget, you’ll find yourself not going out very often if after paying for dinner, drinks, tax, tip, dessert etc. it eats your entire entertainment budget for the month, or even worse, puts you into debt! That my friend is no recipe for romance.

So what’s the answer? It’s simple – Coffee! Or Tea. Either will do. But, can it really take the place of dinner? Well, think about it – if you take the time to find a funky café with cozy seats and you’re with your honey, what’s not to like? You still have the planning as you do with a restaurant, you’re still going out – to a new part of town you haven’t explored before perhaps. You’re at a table together with lots of other people and couples around you, just like a restaurant. You can people watch, eavesdrop and gossip about the people and conversations around you just the same as you would if you were at one of those places where it ends with a large check on the table waiting for you to pay. You can talk, joke and stare into each other’s eyes just the same.

The only difference is that a couple of coffees are going to cost you around $5 even at “expensive” fancy cafes while even moderately priced restaurants are going to want you to part with more than that for the tip alone! Just don’t get tricked into getting a latte – you’re on a budget and the goal is to be able to go out with your honey as much as possible, not pay for the café owner’s trip to Europe. Coffee is the best deal, so stick with it. When times get better, go out for lobster – twice a day even. But until then, don’t be a shut-in, take your sweetie out and have fun!

Hope you found this post useful! Next time I post here, I’ll discuss how to derive all the fun of going out on a date to a first run 3D Imax movie – again, without breaking the bank. :)

About the author: Aleks Oniszczak has followed his own dating advice and has ended up happily married, living in San Francisco working as a QA Engineer at Zoosk. Being Canadian, he enjoys Poutine, skating and universal healthcare.

Photo via Flickr. Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike.

International Kissing Day: A Guide

July 6, International Kissing Day. What does that mean? How do we celebrate “Kissing Day”? Are we supposed to lock lips with someone special this day? Do we study kissing technique? Is the purpose to increase the quantity of smooches? Do we try new styles of kisses? Or is it just a play from Hershey’s to coerce us to buy their chocolate morsels?

Don’t we all already know how to kiss already? We’ve been kissing since we were toddlers. Do we really need a day focusing on it?

To be blunt, the answer is “yes.” We need to set aside one day for the kiss because it’s such an accepted intimate act that carries so much weight in a relationship. It seems that once they’ve been in a relationship for a while, most couples’ kissing styles begin to mesh and they find their smooching groove somewhere in the middle. But, for couples newly dating, without much kissing experience or even for some “old timers”, a little guidance might be in order to guarantee this intimate act is seen as sensual, rather than as a fiasco.

Hygiene

It all starts with cleanliness. You don’t want to go sticking your tongue into someone’s damp cave of halitosis. So, if you know there might be a make-out session in your near future, brush your teeth beforehand. If that’s not possible, carry a travel size bottle of Scope, some mints or a stick of gum to freshen and not offend.

I remember in high school kissing a girl once after she’d eaten what seemed like a wheel of cheese. She wanted to make this kiss an event. Not a good thing. And, while we’re on the subject, fellas, if kissing is in on the horizon, shave so you don’t leave her with stubble rash.

Eyes

The big question: open or closed? The simple answer: closed…duh. Once you have made lip-lock, there’s really no reason to open your eyes. Keep them closed and enjoy the ride. If you open them and your partner catches you, you run the risk of coming off kind of creepy. But, then again, you just caught them with their eyes open, too. Could be a match made in heaven.

Hands

Where do you put your hands while you’re kissing? It really depends on your position. Are you standing at a door? Sitting on a sofa? Lying on a bed? If you’re standing, wrapping your arms around your partner and rubbing their back is a safe way to go (think slow, sensual strokes). Another safe bet for most any position is even placing the hands the face (a hand cupping the jaw or lightly touching the cheek). Hands in your pockets? No!

Tongue

Once the tongue comes into play with a kiss, you start to open the door to passion. A tongue can really heighten a kiss, but it can also douse the fires of excitement if used improperly. Remember, inch for inch, the tongue is the strongest muscle in the human body. So, use that power for good, not evil. That means no shoving or forced entry. And, by all means, keep it in the mouth. No one needs you lapping their lips and chin like a Golden Retriever. Use your tongue to tease and seduce, and you’ll be fine.

Celebrate the kiss today, July 6th. Smooch good-bye on the cheek. Give a peck on the lips in the morning. Increase the passion a la the French. But, be sure that there’s meaning behind each lip-lock. Have fun.

Leon Scott Baxter is America’s Romance Guru and author of A Labor With Love and Out of the Doghouse and the new book, The Finance of Romance

Got some kissing advice you’d like to share? Share your lippiest tips in our comment section!

The Romantic Social Network & The Kissing Expert

Kissing.  It’s the ultimate expression of your affection for someone you like, love or lust after.  And with the worldwide celebration of International Kissing Day on July 6th, Zoosk and The Kissing Expert are encouraging lovers and friends everywhere to take a little romantic journey for the day, and kiss with abandon – it’s the perfect 007 license for seizing the moment with someone you have a crush, crinkl

Now if making a soul connection with someone who gives you butterfly flutters is not enough, here are a few more reasons to indulge in this sweet ‘n sexy pleasure on this happy holiday:e or crunch on, or have long been in a deep relationship with.

  • “A Kiss A Day Keeps the Doctor Away”: As one of The Kissing Expert’s mantras, kissing truly is a total body remedy.  It keeps your heart healthy (it lowers blood pressure), your mind at ease (it drives the secretion of feel good chemicals like serotonin and oxcytocin), your skin rosy and lips plump (the dilating blood vessels give you that fresh “glow”), and improves the essence of youth (passionate “necking” tones the muscles in the jaw and neck line)…If that wasn’t compelling enough, a vigorous smooch session burns calories too (who knew?), which is infinitely more fun than a treadmill (and will keep you tip top frisky!)!
  • Kissing makes your checking account go “ka-ching”: A German study showed that a man who was kissed by his wife before leaving for work was apt to make more money…The reason is simple – kissin
  • Kissing is the tiny spark that can ignite the raging fuego: Nothing says “I want you” better than a soft, sensual brushing of lingering lips.  And whether the relationship is in that fresh “I can’t get enough of you” phase, or totally “tried and true” (and maybe needs the occasional re-boot), getting “lip to lip” is the best sensual prelude for getting “skin to skin”.g breeds contentment, which in turn spurs confidence and self-esteem…This will not only motivate your lover professionally, but personally when it comes the happiness and well-being of your relationship.  You can never kiss too much…

So on July 6th, The Kissing Expert is calling out to the amorous everywhere to commemorate this special day with Zoosk by turning to someone you know, or even don’t know, and kiss with exuberance.  It could make our crazy world a better place!

Andréa Demirjian

The Kissing Expert

@thekissingexpert  www.facebook.com/kissingexpert

Got some kissing advice you’d like to share? Share your lip-lock lessons in our comment section!

Setting Up Your Zoosk Couple Profile

How do you create a joint couple profile with your special someone? This short instructional video shows you how to start creating and sharing your romantic journey on Zoosk. Invite your significant other.

Presented by Zoosk, the Romantic Social Network. Written, directed, and voiced by Juliette Tang. Recorded and edited by Nelsen Brazill.

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Love Lessons from a Bike Messenger

Romance is all about sending the right messages. Which is why Zoosk went to a message-sending professional to ask for love advice. Check out Love Lessons from a Bike Messenger, the latest in Zoosk’s Love Lessons series!

Produced and directed by Juliette Tang. Shot and edited by Nelsen Brazill. Featuring Jeremiah, a bike messenger and cycling advocate in San Francisco. Presented by Zoosk.

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Worth 1000 Words: Making the Most of Your Online Dating Profile Picture

Along with your profile text, your picture is, really, all you are on line.  Your words are your voice and your picture gives you a face.  Zoosk has policies about prohibited photos (https://www.zoosk.com/photo_guidelines.php) and we require that you have at least one photo on your profile before you interact with other members; a clear picture of just you, showing your full (or mostly) face. If you think about it, that makes sense: without a face your messages are just a voice with no body!  You’re like a ghost:  Spooooooky!  So if you want to be not-so-creepy, you’ll want the best pictures you can get.  Now, in all honesty, I am not a photographer, but from several years working online I can offer you some good advice about what is a bad photograph!

The most common problem is the blurry shot.  Back in the day this was caused by poorly focused lenses and incorrect shutter speed, but no one uses such jargon when talking about digital photographs: what matters is called “resolution” or “pixels-per-inch” and when a picture gets blurry it’s called “pixelation”. Forget the lingo: what it means is that some pictures look quite nice very small but when enlarged they look horrid!  Here is a sample:

Notice that the smaller version looks ok.  When expanded to display size (as on your Zoosk datecard) the picture looses all clarity.  This is a bad choice for any photo and our moderating team will probably delete it.  The solution is to start with a larger photo:

If you have a larger photo to start with it won’t expand and so it will show in exactly the way you expect it to.  A blurry pic doesn’t say anything bad.  Other pictures manage to convey a message you mightn’t like however.

Don’t hide your face!  This sends a message, loud and clear, to the other Zooskers looking at your profile: “I have something to hide. There’s a reason I’m too embarrassed to show off my face!” Got a girlfriend already?  If you don’t want to look like some sort of creepy lurker, show your face!

One other problem affects other-wise perfectly good photos: the group shot.

Whose profile is this?  Yes, you might be able to piece it together from other parts of the profile or by pairing it up with other pictures, but what if this is your only photo?  We do ask that your primary photo, at least, be of you only: a clear shot of your face.  Imagine going on your first date in a candle-lit restaurant, would your fellow Zoosker know you from your photo?

Of course you could edit this picture so it was only one face or the other, but then you’d have a too-small picture that would show up blurry on the site just like our first example.  This is fated to be a second photo, but not a primary one.

A companion problem is pictures that are too dark.  These are usually taken with your computer camera – often with a light coming from behind.  This throws off what is called the “exposure” in the picture:

Natural lighting works best, but sometimes your computer may not want to travel outside! Cell phones are good if they take good photos and you can easily get the photo from your phone to the web.  If you have an Android phone or an iPhone/iPad, our Zoosk Apps (available for all three) will let you take a photo and upload it directly to your Zoosk Datecard!

There are some photo problems that seem to affect some users more than others.

Guys seem to take this picture a lot, and we’ve noticed that woman just don’t like it.  At all.  Not one little bit.  In fact, we get complaints about pictures like this and so it violates our moderation rules. We delete pictures like this whenever we see them. Why do guys take this picture over and over? This may be one of the great mysteries of the universe.  This says several things to other users:

You have no friends.

You do have a very big ego.

Probably not much else, however.

You wouldn’t know how to get a woman’s attention if you tried.

Trust me: you have friends!  One of them will help you take pictures!  Just ask – and if you do, indeed, have the sort of body that you can show off, a picture of you relaxing by the pool on vacation is way better than inside your bathroom!

What works best for a primary photo is a nice, smiling picture; the classic head-shot.  But what happens if you add a picture to your profile and instead of looking right it looks like the one below?

We’ve got you covered there!  Next to each picture uploaded on your photo page, you’ll find a blue button that says “Edit”.  Clicking there will help you make simple changes: you can rotate the picture and cut it to size.

There we go!

We do allow secondary photos on your profile, you can have a total of six different shots.  It’s best to show your readers things you enjoy such as you skiing or you in the Community Choir, or you relaxing on the beach with a tropical beverage (preferably with lots of fruit and an umbrella).

All pictures are seen by our moderation team and in the review process they may get deleted.  If a picture suddenly vanishes from your profile, it’s possible it was moderated and deleted.  There are some things that we just don’t allow and you can find out about that on our photo policy page, https://www.zoosk.com/photo_guidelines.php.  Those aside I hope this post helps you avoid not just “illegal” pics but also “bad” ones.  Feel free to contact customer support by email (mailto:support@zoosk.com) or by phone (888-939-6675) if you have any questions.

Congrats to Zoosk couple Jennifer and Cody from Denvor, Colorado!

Congrats to Zoosk couple of the day Jennifer & Cody from Denvor, Colorado!

“Thank you for bringing me and my boyfriend together. I had almost completely given up on love after not having much success. I signed up for Zoosk on a whim to see if there were any good guys left in my town. Then I saw Cody’s page. I’ll admit it wasn’t love at first sight, but certainly lust. He was handsome, had a motorcycle, and most of all, he was normal! He sent me a simple wink, which led to us to talking on social networks, then the phone, and finally in person.

Our first date was mini golfing and I remember being so nervous, but knowing deep down inside that there was something truly unique about Cody. After our second date, I was hooked. I can happily say that Cody and I will be celebrating a year and a half of dating come late October 2011. Thank you so much Zoosk for leading me to the man of my dreams!” –Jennifer & Cody from Denvor, Colorado

Have you met someone special on Zoosk too? Send your success story to success [at] zoosk [dot] com!

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Over 6 million fans on Zoosk’s Facebook page!

Zoosk now has over 6 million Facebook fans! We’re so grateful to our fans for all their love and support. We thank our fans for their love and support in making Zoosk’s one of the most popular pages on all Facebook!

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Love Through the Ages: Pirates

Not even for a bottle of rum would we return to those times! Love wasn’t always so easy before Zoosk.

Like what you see? Check out these other Love Through the Ages videos and other funny Zoosk online dating videos! Continue reading

Zoosk Messenger

ZooskTV presents this new product video about Zoosk Messenger, a chat client you can download from Zoosk straight to your computer desktop. Jeff Knight, Senior Lead Software Engineer, explains how to use Zoosk Messenger and discusses unique product features and capabilities. With Messenger, you can chat on Zoosk and Facebook – at the same time – stream your Zoosk activities feed as it happens, and connect in real time.

Fan us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter if you like what you see here!

Produced and directed by Juliette Tang.
Shot and edited by Gairo Cuevas.
Featuring Jeff Knight, Senior Lead Engineer at Zoosk.
Music by Robert R. Putnam – “Mouton Swing” – no rights reserved.