Today we’d like to present a special success story from Lexie and Robert from Texas! Robert and Lexie both sent us letters sharing their wonderful news. Their enthusiasm, love, and appreciation for each other shows in every word they’ve written. Robert calls Lexie “the most beautiful girl in the world” and Lexie describes Robert as “the most amazing guy in the world” — and that’s how it’s done, folks… that’s how love is supposed to feel.

Let’s start off with Robert’s letter:

I made a Zoosk profile on a Thursday because I was bored. The moment I finished the profile, I saw the most beautiful girl in the world on my homepage. I winked at her. Later that day she responded, “Hi, how are you?” I paid $10 for Zoosk coins so I could email her. On Friday we exchanged numbers, and the next day we arranged to meet.

On Monday, I met the most beautiful girl in the world. Early in the date, a little girl told her that she loved her dress. I agreed. We played two rounds of putt putt golf, and raced in go-karts. A small girl tried to run us down during the race. At the arcade, we played Guitar Hero… I won. Then we played air hockey… she won. She drove me back to my car because I’m a moron and I parked really far away. Before I got out, the most beautiful girl in the world asked, “Do I get a hug?” I said “Of course.” And I hugged her.

The most beautiful girl in the world lives with her parents, because she goes to community college. The next Saturday, I saw her again, and was allowed to pick her up. The most beautiful girl in the world and I went to a sandwich shop. She eats slower than me. I told her I liked her dress… then realized that she was wearing pants and a top. Not a dress. She laughed at me because I’m a moron. I loved it. We played four games of bowling. She won the first, third, and fourth games. Before the second game, I walked up to her and said, “Ok… If I win this one, I get a kiss.” The most beautiful girl in the world agreed. And she tried to beat me. Almost did. I won that game by 4 points. After looking at the scoreboard she walked toward me, pouting, and said, “I lost.” I smiled, wrapped my arms around her, and said, “I won.” We kissed for the first time in a bowling alley surrounded by screaming children. It was amazing.

The most beautiful girl in the world and I planned to see each other the following Friday. But I couldn’t wait. I asked if I could see her sooner. So on that next Wednesday, the most beautiful girl in the world came to visit me. We got ice cream. She got bubblegum flavor, and had a hard time eating it because of the gumballs. It was adorable. We played another game of bowling… she won. I brought the most beautiful girl in the world to my dorm because I wanted to sing to her. I got my guitar, and tried to sing “Realize”. She laughed at me, because I sang the wrong words. I loved it. I sang her a song I wrote. The most beautiful girl in the world told me it was cute. She told me she liked it. And I kissed her. As we lay in each others arms, not moving, scarcely breathing, I did something that I was terribly afraid to do. I told the most beautiful girl in the world that I love her. And she told me that she loves me, too.

The most beautiful girl in the world owns my heart. Her name is Lexie. I like to call her Lexiebear. I met Lexiebear on Zoosk dot com. And I can still barely believe it.

We were touched by the spirit of romance in Robert’s letter. When we read the letter Lexie sent us, we found it to be equally adorable. Read what Lexie had to say about Robert, below.

I’m Lexie and my wonderful boyfriends name is Robert, who is the most amazing guy in the world.

I decided to take a friends advice about joining Zoosk.com. The next day Robert winked at me and I was immediately attracted to him so I messaged back. Over the next few days we started emailing and texting each other back and forth and before I knew it we were planning our first date.

I was so nervous about meeting him because never in my life have I tried online dating site; I was completely out of my comfort zone. But as soon as I saw him and he smiled at me, all of my fear just melted away. On our first date we decided to play mini golf which we both horribly suck at but at least we sucked together. Through the date we rode go carts, played arcade games, and my favorite our air hockey game. At the end of our date I was so scared about how to the date was going to end I figured I couldn’t go wrong with at least asking for a hug. He responded with words that will always make me smile “Of course”.

The following Saturday we went on our second date, we decided to go bowling. After winning the first game, Robert said to me “If I win this game, I get a kiss.” And I agreed, I really did try to beat him but at that point I could care less and I was definitely glad that I lost that round. So we had our first kiss in the middle of a chaotic bowling alley, but in that moment nothing else mattered to me it was only him and me, and I loved every minute of it.

After our second date I couldn’t wait to see him again so I decided to drive up to his dorm. When I got there he took me to get ice cream and on campus bowling. The moments that happened next are the ones I will always hold close to my heart. He took me back to his dorm, when he then picked up his guitar and started signing “Realize” by Colbie Calliat, then he sung me a song he had written himself. I have never in any of my past relationships had a guy sing to me and look at me the way Robert did that day. His words touched my heart and soul. In that moment we kissed and layed in the comfort of each others arms. He then lifted my face up towards his and said the 8 letter, 3 word phrase we all want to hear someone say to us, He said “I love you” for the first time. And without a doubt in my mind I said “I love you too”.

I remember when he said to me “why is a beautiful girl like you still single?” The reason I was still single was because I was scared of to let anyone all the way in because of the fear of getting hurt. With Robert something inside me told me to take a chance on opening myself up to love. And I’m so glad I did because now I have the most amazing guy in the world to call mine. I have fallen head over heels for him; I swear to love him forever and always. I still can’t believe that I owe it all to Zoosk.com and my best friend for convincing me to join.

Congrats Lexie and Robert! We wish the two of you all the happiness in the world. If you have your own Zoosk success story to share, send it to us with a photo of you and your loved one and we’ll send you an Amazon (or other online retailer of your choice) gift card as a token of our congratulations.

By Juliet O

Even though winter is cold and gray, there are plenty of fun icy-weather dates to be had during the months of December through February! Instead of putting on those extra five to ten pounds to keep your body warm in the frigid chill, why not meet someone sexy who raises your body temperature without raising your utility bills (and body mass index)? So turn on your computer and go to Zoosk, where 40 million singles are all putting their icy fingertips to the keyboard this season with one solitary purpose: meeting someone to hibernate with during the short days and loooong nights with (wink wink) of winter. Kiss seasonal depression good-bye with a hot winter date.

Play in the snow: go skiing or snowboarding, take a winter walk, or play it simple and build a snowman together!

Pretend that the snow is actually sand and instead of being outside in negative ten degree weather you’re actually at a Caribbean island. Just kidding. You don’t have to pretend that snow is anything other than snow, because a white winter can actually be really romantic and gorgeous in its own right. Why else are ski vacations such a popular pastime for couples? Winter walks can be lovely if you’re bundled up and holding hands, mitten to mitten. You can give each other Eskimo kisses as snowflakes drift from the halcyon sky and land in your lashes as you gaze into each others eyes. My favorite winter walks are those that occur at dusk when the moon is big and bright, the streetlamps are lit like a vintage movie, and the stars in the night sky reflect and dance off the snow. When you get home, where it’s cozy and warm, you can make hot cocoa and cuddle together on the couch while watching DVDs of romantic winter movies like It’s A Wonderful Life and March of the Penguins.

Dine together on hot foods that are typically associated with the winter season

Imaging great winter foods, a few variables come to mind. First, the food should be warm in temperature to put some warmth in your system, like chicken noodle or savory lentil soup. To protect you through the cold, the food should help you break a sweat — feel free to add the spicy hot peppers! Second, the food needs to be satisfying and comforting — something that lifts the spirit in times of chill — so think of foods that make you feel good, like cheesy casseroles, roasted game, Christmas puddings, and steaming hot gingerbread. Mmmm. And experiment with winter produce! Winter doesn’t mean that your only food choices are cabbage and potatoes — did you know that avocados, citrus fruits like grapefruits and oranges, bananas, greens like chard and kale, and root veggies like turnips, celery roots, and rutabagas are in season during the winter months too? A root veggie gratin, sauteed greens, and a desert of banana cream pie. Mmm.

Veg out at home — nothing is more romantic than being snowed-in with your romantic somebody

Snow day? Can’t go to work because there’s a foot of snow in your driveway? Or, say you live somewhere it doesn’t snow, like California — why not pretend you’re snowed in with your sweetie, even if you aren’t? The best part about winter is that you have an excuse to be a homebody. “It’s too cold; we can’t go out.” Who says you need to leave the house to have a good time? Get in front of the television with your partner and watch that marathon of Lost DVDs. Order Chinese take-out and spend the night playing board games against one another. Spend a quiet night at home reading together. Go on a baking marathon with your date and get all your Christmas cookies out of the way in one go — making sure to use the heart-shaped cookie cutter for the cookies you bake for one another. Whatever you need to do to make your winter romantic, you can do it without leaving the house.

Find your winter love on Zoosk today!

Some other articles you might be interested in:
Having good testimonials might get you a date
Are you in love with the idea of being in love?
When it comes to love it’s worth a try

photo credit: the wicked soul

What’s a testimonial? A testimonial is a short blurb from a friend or acquaintance that says something positive about you. We publish third party testimonials on Zoosk because testimonials are a great way to give potential matches more information about you from people who know you. It gives someone who looks at your profile the chance to hear something nice about you from a third party. Because this information is coming from a source who knows personally, it gives credibility to the fact that those great things they say about you are true. It’s uncouth to brag openly about yourself, so why not have one of your friends brag about you on your behalf?

If you’re wondering about how the get testimonials for your Date Card, read on for step-by-step instructions! Log into Zoosk and go to your Date Card tab. At the very bottom, below where you enter your favorite music, movies, and books, you’ll see bold text that says “Testimonials”. If you do not have any testimonials, the page will say, “You do not have any testimonials” and show a link that asks you to invite your friends to offer testimonials for you. Click this link to get testimonials! It will take you to the next page, screenshot below.

Clicking “Invite friends to get more testimonials!” will take you to a page that looks like the image above. You can invite people from your email networks, like Gmail, Yahoo Mail, Windows Live, and AOL. All you need to do is enter your email login name and password and click “Continue.” Zoosk does not store any passwords. This feature uses the same technology that helps you locate contacts on Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, or other social networking sites and doesn’t store any of your or your contacts’ information. Once you click continue, the screen will pull up a list of your contacts. You can choose specific contacts and send them a request. Your contacts do not have to be Zoosk or Facebook members.

You can also invite people straight from Facebook. On the same page there will be a link, highlighted in yellow, that says “Invite your Facebook friends to write testimonials for you”. Click that link and you will see your Facebook friends pop up on the next page. Simply choose which friends you’d like to get testimonials from.

If you would prefer not to upload your Facebook friends or to load your Gmail or Yahoo Mail contacts, or if you use a different email server that isn’t listed on the sidebar, you can invite  your friends to send their testimonials by directly typing in their email addresses into the system. We then automatically send testimonial invites to their inbox. Click the link that says “or type in your friends email addresses” and you will be directed to a page that looks like the screenshot below.

Put your emails in the blanks and click “Invite Now.” You’re done!

Once they’ve written a testimonial for you, you’ll get an email at the same address you use to log into Zoosk (if you use Zoosk as a FB application, this will be at the same email address you use to log into Facebook). This is the same email where you get all the other Zoosk notifications, like notices about messages and updates on our site. The email will look just like the screencap below.

The testimonial your friend submitted will be now on your Zoosk Date Card. It will be on the side bar, to the left of your personal information. See?

Doesn’t it look great? Now potential Zooskers will be able to read awesome tidbits and compliments about you from your friends. What better way to advertise what a great catch you are than to get a testimonial from someone who knows you already? Get a testimonial today!

By Juliet O

You’ve put all that work in making a great Date Card, but you’re still not fully satisfied with the number of clicks you’re getting? You want to raise your page views, but don’t know what to do? It’s not you, don’t worry. But it’s not your Date Card, either. There are simple ways to get even more profile views and raise your chances of meeting the right person on Zoosk, by simply following some of our tips on promoting your online dating profile via social media tools.

Great online dating profiles shouldn’t just sit there waiting to be discovered. Take your online dating fate into your own ambitious, single-person hands! If you want love in this day and age, there is no shame on promoting yourself, within reason, to making finding it an easier process. There are definitely ways to raise your chances of having your profile fall across the path of the right person, on Zoosk and on the web. Here are our suggestions.

Post on Zoosk’s Community Pages

Our Community Pages are a great place to get valuable dating advice and voice your opinion on topics relevant to online dating. The pages are also a great place to have your profile seen by the dating community at large. By making yourself prominent on our boards and contributing great content to our community, you expose your profile in a positive way to the numerous Zooskers who visit them daily. Your comments on the boards are also added to your Zoosk status feed, which shows up on your Date Card and on the Zoosk front page that is seen by singles in your local area.

Fan Zoosk on Facebook and comment on our updates

Zoosk has a very active Facebook Fan community that is growing  by the day. Check out how many people comment or “like” each of our status updates! Join in on the discussion via our Facebook Fan page and meet other Zooskers via their virtual discussions. Invite your friends to join our Facebook community as well, and you might even get free coins from one of our Facebook fan contests! Keep an eye on our Fan Page in the future, to hear about Zoosk news, releases, dating advice and information, as well as future community contests and programs of interest to our beloved Zooskers.

Integrate Zoosk on Facebook

We are aware that not all people want to be public about their online dating lives. Our Facebook application allows you to adjust your privacy settings to hide all your Zoosk activity so that no one in your Facebook network has to know that you are involved in any manner with online dating. But for people who want to be a bit more public about Zoosk, you can install our Facebook application to your main FB page and let others know, via FB, that you are single and searching.

Tweet about online dating and follow us on Twitter

Another way to publicize your online dating profile is to use Twitter and “tweet” out about your involvement with Zoosk. Follow us on Twitter and tweet @Zoosk and we promise to send you a shout-out in return. Use #hashtags to talk about online dating like #zoosk or #onlinedating, write about your topics “@Zoosk,” and discover that Twitter is a great way to publicize your Zoosk Date Card to other  Zooskers on the site. You can also contact us on Twitter via a direct message or a Tweet if you have any questions or concerns about Zoosk. As we say, “Roses are red, violets are blue, you follow us, and we’ll follow you!”

Blog about online dating

Finally, blogging is a great way to let off some steam and write about your experiences. Who doesn’t have a personal blog these days? They can be so cathartic and therapeutic. There are so many online dating blogs and singles blogs that deal with issues like dating and romance, so why not join in on the dialogue and get your voice heard? The blogosphere is a great way to publicize your online dating profile, if you take the leap of faith and put yourself out there! Don’t worry, the web isn’t such a scary place. Embrace the future of love!

Photo credit: bobby-james

By Juliet O

You know in those beginning stages of getting to know someone (whether in real life or online) when you know you like this person but you’re trying to figure out if they like you? You don’t really know how they feel 100% (plus you’re shy) so you don’t really want to start talking about being “in a relationship”, plus you don’t know how to bring up the topic in the first place without being the weirdo who brings up the topic in the first place. Right? How existential and circular. I feel like I’m in a Charlie Kaufman screenplay. But seriously, how do you talk about relationships without talking about relationships? Specifically, how do you say things like “I want to be in a relationship with you but let’s talk about it” without sending out total creep or stalker or crazy person vibes?

Through my extensive first person research and years spent analyzing this very topic exactly, I know of some great methods for talking about relationships without talking about relationships. There are ways, as counterintuitive as it seems, to bring up the relationship chat without explicitly bringing it up. I suppose some people would view this as a failure of communication, but I think of it more as “communicating subtly” (i.e. self preservation). For the shy ones out there, here’s how you do it.

Talk about love, vaguely and generally.

What better way to segue into the relationship chat than to talk about love? Rather than being all “So what are we?” you can simply talk about your feelings and hopes and desires. This is an ingenious way to talk about a potential relationship, because you can give very concrete and specific opinions you have on love and then ask for affirmation or denial. If you get affirmation, great, perhaps you have more courage now to move forward and explicitly state your wants. If you get denied, then you know that you should probably stop wearing your heart on your sleeve and move on. Like? “They say that the moment you meet someone you realize you could love, you know it. Do you agree?” Hint.

Bring up a scenario in a movie/novel/play/music video that mirrors your situation.

There are millions of instances in popular culture where this very emotional conundrum appears. Uncertain love is everywhere, so find a situation that sort of mirrors your own and bring it up and see what your person has to say. For instance, if I was totally in love with my friend but he didn’t realize it, I’d bring up the movie Some Kind of Wonderful (1987) and say something to the effect of, “I feel sort of like Mary Stuart Masterson’s character in that movie.” And then I’d look at my guy and see if he starts shying away uncomfortably or if he looks into my eyes and tells me that he wants to be with me forever.

Make your person listen to a really romantic love song, inch closer to them, and see how they respond.

This one works every time. So you are feeling crazy romantic toward someone but you’re sort of getting mixed signals and you want to see once and for all if they’re into you that way or just want to be friends? Pop a love song (something super cheesy like “True” by Spandau Ballet) while you’re alone together, sitting on the couch maybe, and then move closer to them and see what happens. Maybe you should make an entire playlist in case things start going really, really well. If they’re not into you, they’ll get awkward and move away. If they’re into you, they’ll put up with your advances, and then who knows what will happen.

Talk about past relationships, but not in a nostalgic way.

If you really want this thing you have with someone to turn into a relationship, another way to bring up the relationship chat is to talk about past relationships. Talk about how your relationships developed, how you knew it was love, what you did in the beginning of that relationship when things were uncertain, and then cautiously move the conversation toward your situation with this new person. Again, if they’re not having it, they’ll change the subject and you can move on with your life. If they start talking to you about their relationships in return, this is perfect timing to bridge the topic of the possibility of a new relationship, between the two of you.

Talk about how you want to avoid dating people who aren’t on the same page as you.

If none of the above approaches sound like they’ll work for you (like if your person is totally dense and doesn’t respond well to hints), then maybe you need to be more direct. How can you be more direct without being entirely direct? Why not just bring up how you hate people who string you along or lead you on and then look at them accusingly? This approach might not work for everyone, but it’s sure to bring the skeletons tumbling out of the closer if your person is really, in fact, leading you on. Who, if they are leading someone on, can stand there innocently as someone is essentially going off on people who lead people on, and then staring accusingly?

I hope these tips help. Obviously the best advice is just to be direct, but I understand that it’s not always easy and sometimes we need a temporary crutch before we go back to being the honest, earnest people we are.

Photo credit: zabara_tango

Mashable’s 3rd Annual OpenWeb Awards are open for user submitted nominations and votes. Last year, Zoosk won an OpenWeb Award for Best Dating and Romance site. This year, Dating and Romance is no longer a category, so Zoosk is up for overall Best Facebook Application! We’re excited for the opportunity to win this category, so help us out with your nominations and we will love you forever (and ever and ever).

How do you nominate Zoosk for Best Facebook Application? Simply go to the Best Facebook Application nomination landing page. Make sure you are logged into Mashable via your Facebook username and password (to vote, you must log in via Facebook Connect). Once you’re on the nominations landing page, type “Zoosk” into the field for “Best Facebook App”. Then hit “Submit”. You’re done. Beautiful.

Nominate us, and then tell your friends to nominate us. We love you dearly. Please love us back?

By Juliet O

Why do we search for love? I might as well ask you why the sun shines or why water is wet. We don’t always know why we search for love; we just do it. Perhaps the only answer to such a complex question is simply “because.” Most of us hope that one day we will find someone we love who will love us back, with whom we can grow with in an affectionate, positive relationship of the sort that fairy tales describe as “happily ever after”. We don’t really question why. We feel an almost subconscious drive, and in our search most of us encounter a lot of false alarms, dead ends, and failures before finding the person who makes all our struggles worth the effort.

I recently posed to our Zoosk community a question, “Why do you search for love? What are your personal reasons for continuing along the path towards relationship fulfillment?” The answers I received were a surprising and poignant study on the depths of the human heart. It seems that our community is a romantic bunch, and they’re looking for love because, in the words of one Zoosker, “I am looking for hope.” Here’s what some of our other Zooskers had to say. Get out your Kleenex.

“My life would not be as happy without love, and I know I need some kind of romantic love and intimacy to feel content, but other than that, I suppose I search because someday, I hope to really find the puzzle piece that I have yet to grasp my fingers around!” -Carly

“I myself am fine being alone but it’s instinctual to want to connect. Humans by nature are communal. Most of us just want to connect with others. We want to share our lives with someone because it brings purpose for our being.” -Brian

“Looking for love is more about finding someone worth sharing all of these wonderful and beautiful things in life with at a level that friends just can’t. Not to mention there’s nothing like coming home to the open arms of someone special when you think you’ve had more than you can take.” -Shannon

“‘I’m looking because life is too short to waste away. It’s best shared with someone special who fills in the gaps. Someone to share the little things and big things with. Someone to laugh and joke around with… someone who will for no reason smile and out of the blue rock your world just because it feels good. Someone to be himself and you be yourself. What more can you ask for??? Love is special and should be shared with that someone.” -Angelina_Ace95

“I’m looking for love because I want that special connection. I want to be some gal’s man and for her to be my gal.” -Jason

“My reasons are to have someone to connect with, especially emotionally and mentally. I do not think you can find that in this world a lot, but it’s rare also. I definitely miss every little thing about being in a serious relationship, the hugs and kisses, the falling asleep together, being your natural self around someone totally different from you, it’s an amazing feeling. The main thing is I want to have someone that I can be myself completely, and we both can receive what we want from the other person equally and respectfully. I want to be in love, that real love.” -Reana

“My reasons? In some way I’m not entirely sure… I guess it’s for that feeling of warmth of having another person around. I guess love to me is what happiness is. To see the one you love’s smile once more, there is nothing more wonderful than that. I would do anything, to have that feeling again. That is my reason to be here. In the hope of finding someone who would smile everyday for me.” -fight_for_freedom_12

“Taking a drive to admire fall color, or Christmas lights, or what have you without someone is just really not worth the bother. Cuddling is simply impossible without someone to share it with, I’ve had nobody to give a foot rub to since she left and it’s driving me nuts. I also miss having somebody around whose back needs scratching. Not having an outlet for this stuff is much harder than I anticipated, nobody to send camera phone pics of flowers or blue sky, nobody to share the little details of our days. It’s enough to make a guy take up blogging even if nobody reads it just to get it out!” -rollerdave

“Loneliness would have to be the most heartbreaking experience one can go through. I believe that it is a very slow and painful death. The desire to share and connect with another is intense. Essentially the longing to share a meal, conversation, laugh, drink, cuddle…perhaps more is a drive that rages in the pit of out subconscious whether we like it or not.” -pip_squeak

“Looking for my other half gives me insight into people, them and myself. It lets me see the bright and dark side of so many people, the grey areas and how they all tie together and work. In an odd way, it helps me see how bad habits or bad intentions can be used for good things.” -S H

“I have always dreamed of making a family, being a father, being a husband, etc. It’s been one of my long term goals since I was sixteen years old. I was never one for ‘casual flings’. That sort of thing always seemed like a waste of time, energy and emotion to me.” -Jes

“I look for love because its just one of those beautiful things you can’t replicate. You can’t force it and you can’t do it alone.” -Lascial

Everyone searches for love for different reasons. Some of us don’t want to be alone. Some of us want someone to share our experiences with. Some of us like the security of having someone there who will stand by us no matter what. Regardless of our reasons, the drive or desire for love is something that is innate to the human experience and is as complicated as the emotion of love itself.

Photo credit: aussiegall

By Juliet Ohai

First date jitters are the worst. Letting your nerves get the best of you can lead to a number of absolute first date blunders: talking too much, saying weird things, saying things you don’t mean, sweating profusely, blushing constantly, stammering, being creepy… the list goes on.

One of the absolute worst things that can happen to you as a result of first-date jitters is not saying anything at all. Contributing to the conversation is something you absolutely have to do if you go on a date, and if conversation halts to a stand-still, both parties need to facilitate conversation to keep it going. Saying yes to a date is like signing a contract, agreeing, “As long as you aren’t some sort of twisted, loathsome supervillain, I will do my best to talk to you for the duration of our date.” But talking — even rote, mundane, smalltalk — isn’t always easy, particularly if you’re nervous.

So we’ve come up with some talking points for you, to use as a prompt when conversation starts to dry up. Don’t get flustered! Remember, this date is in your hands. Remember these prompts, and never have a silent, awkward date ever again.

Day to day activities

• Ask your date what they did that day. Did they have a good day?
• How was work? Are you doing anything interesting or exciting at the office?
• Did your date do anything fun over the past week or weekend? Ask how their week went.

Personal history

• Where is your date originally from?
• Where did your date grow up?
• Where did your date go to college (if so)?
• How many brothers or sisters does your date have? Asking about family is always a good resort. Ask what it was like to grow up in the kind of family they grew up in.

Personal tastes

• Asking about music is always a good call when you run out of things to say. Ask what kind of music your date enjoys.
• Movies are safe talking territory. What was the last movie your date saw?
• Books are safe too. Has your date read a good book lately?
• What kind of food does your date enjoy? Talking about food is great because you might be able to casually slip in plans to have a second date. “Oh, you enjoy ____ food? I know a great place…”

Goals and passions

• Try to find what it is your date is passionate about. What are some of their interests? Do they have any passions/hobbies that they spend a lot of time working on?
• What are some goals they have for their life or career?

Local questions

• If you’re dating a person in your local area, it’s great to ask them some local questions, like where do they go for fun?
• What are some of your date’s favorite restaurants or bars? You can always ask, “Have you ever been to _____ yet?”
• What is your date’s neighborhood like, if they live in a different neighborhood than you?
• If you like the great outdoors, talk about fun outdoor activities available to you in your local area.

Random life questions

• Where has your date traveled and where would they want to go one day?
• If your date was stuck on a desert island, what 3 things would they bring?
• How would your date describe themselves in 3 words?
• What’s one thing your date has never done, but which they’d love to do one day?

Don’t ever let first date nerves take away your tongue. It’s okay if you don’t say much, but you can’t say nothing at all. So keep some of these prompts in mind next time you feel tongue-tied on a date!

photo credit: eyeliam

By Juliet O

What are some keys to a healthy relationship? All great relationships have certain things in common. Here is a list of the qualities to look for in building a great, lasting relationship with someone. I challenge you to find a single example of a good, functioning relationship that does not exhibit all of these characteristics. The following are universal characteristics of all wonderful relationships, and you deserve to find a person who exhibits them all:

10. Empathy

An individual’s ability to empathize with you is crucial in a relationship. Empathy is an important relationship skill that both parties should develop. Empathy is the ability to view the world from your partner’s eyes. Being able to put yourself in your partner’s shoes is essential to building a long term relationship based on mutual understanding. Empathy means being a team, a “we” rather than an isolated “I”.

9. Acceptance

Your partner should be able to “get” you. They should know your tastes, your likes, your dislikes, your moods, your innate personality — they should know that “real” you, and love you for being exactly who you are. Acceptance is a key relationship skill. Both you and your partner should accept one another for exactly the people that you are, faults and all. Your partner should love you because of everything that comprises who you are. Don’t accept any less.

8. Chemistry

Physical chemistry is important. While it may not be the most important thing on this list, healthy relationships require attraction as a force. You and your partner ought to be attracted to one another, physically and emotionally, and that attraction should lead to a healthy level of chemistry that can be sustained over time.

7. Steadfastness

Your partner should be steadfast with you in promises and obligations. With you, your partner should be able to keep his or her word. Steadfastness leads to trust, which is absolutely essential in healthy, long-term relationships. If your partner isn’t steadfast with you, then you have little reason to grow trust with this person. Do not become intimately involved with someone who cannot keep their word.

6. Goals

It is important that you and your partner support each others’ goals in life. Relationships take constant work and require that you and your partner have a willingness to work together and grow together. Your partner should support and help you reach the goals you want in your life.

5. Generosity

Your partner should be generous with you, not in the financial sense, but in the emotional sense. Most importantly, your partner ought to be generous with time, when it comes to you. An essential aspect of relationships is the ability to “give”. If you notice that your partner takes and takes without giving, perhaps it’s time to find a new partner. Generosity is the essence of healthy relationships.

4. Priorities

Your partner and you do not need to have the exact same priorities in life, but it certainly helps if your priorities are aligned. If you want to move to India one day to teach yoga at a spiritual retreat and your partner wants to move to Los Angeles to jumpstart a career in the entertainment industry, your priorities are definitely not aligned. Sometimes, for a relationship to thrive, priorities can be adjusted or redefined, which is fine, but both parties should be equally flexible in this.

3. Trust

Trust is the single most important factor when it comes to when a relationship is a success or a failure. You must be able to trust your partner, and your partner must be able to trust you. And both of you should give the other person reason to trust. With trust, you have the ability to be vulnerable — an important factor in long-term, successful partnerships. If you can’t be vulnerable with your partner, it’s time to move on.

2. Communication

Good relationships have great communication structures. Bad relationships almost always have terrible communication between partners. You and your partner should speak the same language, emotionally speaking, in the sense that you should be able to communicate your desires successfully. Neither party should be timid about asserting themselves when appropriate, and neither party should feel shy about communicating feelings at any point. Do you and your partner have successful communication?

1. Commitment

Commitment is the most important quality to look for when deciding a successful match. If you are searching for love and a long-term relationship, you and your partner must be able and willing to commit to one another, understanding all the sacrifices and adjustments that are necessary when transitioning from single life to life as a couple. The key to commitment is love. If you love someone, commitment should be no less than nature.

photo credit: search engine people blog

By Juliet O

Hello singles. Are you celebrating? Because in case it’s escaped your radar, this week is National Singles Week!

20 years ago, a group of people known as the Buckeye Singles Council created NSW to celebrate the lives and accomplishments of single and unmarried people, and to recognize their important contributions to society (like keeping bars and nightclubs open!). Since its inception, NSW has become widely observed around the world.

Coinciding with National Singles Week, we conducted a survey of over a thousand of our Zooskers, asking you for your thoughts on single and unmarried life. The results are fascinating. Contrary to what you might think, we found that the men we surveyed voted that they’d rather settle down in a relationship, while the women we surveyed stated that they enjoyed being single. 49% of men wish they weren’t single, as opposed to 31.5% of women.

We also found that Zooskers, overall, have quite a romantic viewpoint on love.
The majority of Zooskers indicated that they choose to remain single because they are waiting for “the One”. And while Zooskers are enjoying singlehood for now, the majority of you definitely see wedding bells in your future and plan to get married one day down the line.

Being single is great. You can hang out with whomever you want to, whenever you want to. You don’t have to worry about pleasing anyone else and can focus your attentions on yourself. You can go anywhere, buy anything, and do anything you wish. You can take yourself out to a movie for no reason. You can book a ticket for a solo holiday. You don’t need to share your Netflix queue. You can eat onions what that burger without brushing your teeth right afterward. You can date casually. You can see your friends as much as you want. Being single means the terms of your life are up to you and no one else, and that is such a liberating feeling worthy of celebration.

Being single means you have no one to be accountable to except for yourself. And, best of all, being single means that love could be just around the corner every time you step out the door. Zooskers, embrace the fun of being single! Because being single is really, really fun. All you need is a positive attitude and a sense of adventure. As for Zoosk, well, we’re just along for the ride.

Bonus! Here’s Shayan Zadeh, Zoosk’s CEO, being interviewed about National Singles Week on “Cocktails with Patrick,” a radio show on Cosmo Radio.

Listen to Shayan on “Cocktails with Patrick”!

photo credit: smanography